Atlanta Dating Blog

Yo yo where my dogs at? What's cracking? Lemme bring y'all up to speed on what's been happening in the last couple of weeks or so since I laid down my last blog entry. I have been in a writing mood lately and I have managed to write about six different songs. Some of them are pretty good and some of them are ok. I don't have the beats for them or nothing but I definitely got some dope lyrics down on paper. What I need to do now is hookup with some cats that got the beats down ya heard and throw my shit on top of it. I put an ad on craigslist to try and find someone that will produce some music for me to throw these lyrics onto. I know I may have to modify it a bit to whatever music they got but I am sure I am gonna find someone that can help me. The goal here is to take these 6 songs I wrote and find someone to create the beats for them and refine one song into something good then throw that shit on a cd or a memory stick or whatever or maybe upload it somewhere like youtube and then get some cats from A & R and shit to listen to it and be like yoo that shit is dope, I gotta meet this MC yo! That is the plan, I just put up the ad on craisglist last night so I gotta wait to here from some peeps.

I ain't had much luck with the women lately... oh yeah I am sure you want to know how my sobriety is going and shit. Well I have to be honest, I started to smoke weed again. I ain't been drinking or nuthing and I know it was the booze that was the main problem. The thing is that I always smoked weed when I drank too so now I just chill and burn blunts and shit and it seems to be fine. I ain't had no cravings to drink so far. The only time I really get a craving is when I am a bit nervous because I know it is like liquid courage and shit but I just want to get rid of the nervousness feeling, I don't actually want to drink and get drunk and shit and I haven't given in cuz I know once I head down that road things will get fucked up, that is just how drinking is. Ok let's talk about dem fly honies yo! Where the fly honies at?! That is a good question because although I have been out on some dates... I wouldn't go as far as saying anything of them were fly honies. They were all kinda hurting if you know what I mean. I mean I have been basically settling for fatties and uglies yo. I mean they ain't THAT bad obviously but I could do so much better, and I know that none of these girls I would want to fuck with long term.

So you I met this chick Debra last week for coffee and shit. I told her yo meet me at this joint called Octane Coffee Company. The place is cool and all and it reminds me of Brawndo the Thirst Mutilator!! It has what plants want... it has electrolytes! Anyways, so I met her there at like 3pm and I knew she was a blonde chick. I couldn't tell how fat she was from her pics - she looked decent and cute. So I go in there and I don't see her sitting anywhere so I check the line and sure enough there was this blonde chick there with big titties on and a short skirt on. She was chubby though but cute and I was like hmmm ok, cuz I was just tempted to walk out the door. So I say hi and we grab our coffees and shit and go and sit down. I talked to her for a couple of hours and shit but her titties were hanging out of her top and they were big and I was staring at them a lot. I was like damn this chick is kind of heavy and shit but she got some fat ass titties that I wouldn't mind sucking on. So we left the coffee shop and we went for a walk in the park and I wanted to grab them titties so I told her I wanted to kiss her and she was like ok. So we made out in the park for a bit and I felt up her melon titties for a while and then I was like I have to go. I went home and deleted her from MSN. Next!

Today is day 64 of being clean and sober. It has been easier than I thought but sometimes it is very difficult for me. I have so many things that are triggers for me. One thing I forgot to tell you guys is that when I was in recovery we had a lot of time to do nothing there so I read a few books. I saw this book called The Catcher in the Rye and I always heard it was a great book and all so I thought I would take the time to read it. I hadn't read a book in a while so it was a little hard to get going at first but once I got into it, I was reading like a madman, I really was. It is 214 pages long and I had a good time reading it up until about page 100 when I realized that not much was happening with the plot. Also it is written from a point of view called streaming conscientious and that gets tiring to read after a while. Of course the main reason is because the main character Holden Caulfield is about the most annoying, boring, whining person ever. I was however convinced that something epic was going to happen because afterall this book is listed like #3 of all time etc etc JD Sallenger is a god blah blah. It basically got harder and harder to read, because I hated the main character so much and I was sick of reading about his psychotic ramblings.

I finally managed to finish the book though and sadly nothing really happens. I couldn't even tell you what the climax of the story was. I assumed the whole thing was some kind of giant metaphor. I really thought it was. I mean who else would write all that shit. The book sells 250k copies every single year and is the most censored book in history because there is a part about a prostitute and also the words "Fuck you". Later I Googled the book and they said it was a metaphor for teenage angst and described the modern rebelling teenager. At least I can say I have read one classic book now. If I am ever at a fancy cocktail party and someone makes a cather in the rye reference I will get it.. like when a body meets a body in the rye. Ok enough of that god damn book for chissakes. OH yeah he took lots of liberties with the English language too, there was so much slang and stuff in there blah - I am going to read Cat's Cradle by Vonnegut next. I read the first 5 pages and it seems pretty freaking bizarre so far.

Ok so let's talk about my love life or lack of it lol jk it has been going pretty good lately. I have been talking to a couple of new girls that I met on the online dating site. None of the girls I was talking to before really worked out - they kind of faded into the distance now. There are I think about 4 new girls I am talking to that are cool. I have just been talking with them and I haven't looked and browsed at girls and sent any new messages in about a week now. There have probably been like 300 new girls that live within 10km of me that have joined since then so I am going to send out some new messages to those girls when I am done here. One of the girls, her name is Kandice and we met for coffee the other day at this place called Java Jive Coffee House And Cafe. The place was really cool and it was a good date. I never kissed her or anything but we had a good time and I have been chatting with her ever since. She is really smart. I can't say I have been writing much lately but I am going to try and put pen to paper this weekend.

Well my new life begins. Let me break it down for y'all. Just over a month ago, a few days after my last blog post, I got an offer. An offer that would change my life. I had submitted some music to a record label and they had replied telling me that they like it but that I need work. I went to a party and I ran into the music label owner. The thing is that I was totally smashed out of my mind, I mean, I had no idea that I was going to run into someone like that. I had no idea that the party I was going to was at such a nice place. It was my cousin who invited me. So I went up and introduced myself and shit and he was like yeah I remember your demo etc and things were cool. I was really really hammered though and I was all wobbly and slurring and obnoxious. He told me he doesn't drink or do drugs and I was like no way. He said he had been clean and sober for 7 years now and that is why he is so successful.

He told me that I could have this same amount of success if I were to stop drinking and smoking. I told him there was no way I could do that shit, that I had a problem. He said I know you can't, but I can send you somewhere where they can help you. He told me about this facility for recovery in New Mexico. He said he would send me there and I was like wtf. He said he would pay to send me there and that if I came back clean and sober and was able to lay down some fresh material he would check it out and perhaps sign me to the label. He said at minimum he will make sure some of my songs get airtime and he said we can see what the pubic decides. I have never been so excited in my life. I have been clean and sober now for 40 days and the world seems like a different place. I still have trouble falling asleep at night and sometimes I get really anxious but I definitely have more energy.

I would like to sit here and say that my lyrics are flowing but they aren't. I think I need more time to detox before I can relax enough to find my mojo again and start writing and start feeling the music again. I decided to delete my profile online before I left and I stopped talking to all those girls. They know me as someone different. I think it would be best to start fresh with everything. I am going to really think through my new profile, and then put up something good so I attract the right kind of girl. I will update here again once I do that and also end out to some fresh messages to all the new girls that have joined the site since I was last on it.

Yeah I definitely blew things with Julia, in fact I think I might have a drinking problem and I have been considering joining Alcoholics Anonymous but I am kind of scared and nervous to go and also at the same time I am not sure if I have a problem or not. Well I guess I know I have a problem with it but I am not sure if going to AA is even going to help so I wonder what the point is at all in going. Maybe I just need to keep an eye on my addiction myself. I think I can learn to cut back on the amount I drink. Maybe I don't really have a problem, I mean I don't drink a lot everyday, it just seems that when I go out to clubs and stuff that I go way overboard and get really drunk and black out and then not remember stuff and obviously I also piss people off during this process I should just stick to drinking weed and try and stay away from the hard alcohol for a few weeks and see what happens. The problem is that when I go to a club or whatever I get nervous and when I have some booze then I feel all chilled and I can relax and enjoy myself properly.

I never ended up getting to go on a date with Chloe and now she is in Europe for the next 3 weeks sigh. I almost regret meeting this girl online because I can't get her out of my head and I can't fully focus on other girls until I either score or strikeout with this girl. I know that I don't really even know what her personality is like yet in depth. I mean we have had some cool conversations and stuff but she might be a complete bitch for all I know and all this thought could end up being a complete waste of time. I have a tendency to do this kind of thing to myself.

I have been doing some writing recently. Earlier today I was watching some freestyle rapping videos on the internet of Tom Green, Xzibit, and Eminem and I got inspired to work on my rap tunes. So I first started out freestyling and recording my shit onto my computer, and then later I went back and listened to it and wrote down the parts that sounded cool. Now I am trying to take all that I wrote down and convert it into a song. It is harder than I remember last time.

Nothing really happening with Chloe yet. I am slowly trying to earn brownie points and make myself look cool but the good news is that I am now chatting with her on MSN so yay! She isn't online all the time because she is working quite often flying around modeling and doing fashion shows etc. She is not even in Atlanta that often she said recently because of how busy she is with work etc.

I did however take out that girl Julia for dinner. I met her at this place called Silk Restaurant and she was quite impressed with the place. The food was really good and so was the service. I kept thinking wow this girl is so young, I am 29 years old myself and this girl is only 25 but she acts and looks and sounds like she is only 22. I mean it was kind of refreshing to be with someone so naive and bubbly and so full of positivity but I was also thinking I am probably wasting my time with a girl that is so unworldly and ignorant. Sometimes people think that the word ignorant is offensive but I really think that people who are ignorant are lucky that their minds have not yet been polluted by negative things in this world. Also when I saw ignorant I don't mean like someone who is old and ignorant and is an asshole, I just mean people who haven't been exposed to or been through all the harsh negative things that this world can dump on you. So because she is still so untainted and naive, sure it's great now, but what is going to happen once the veil is lifted? Will she change? Most people do change once they finally are exposed to and accept the shitty things in life.

On the flipside I guess I could just stop over analyzing everything and just go with the flow and enjoy her innocence. The whole time we were talking at the table and I was looking across at her, I was comparing her to Chloe. I mean that is what guys do. We are like programmed to visually compare every girl we meet with our ideal vision of a girl - I mean strictly physical. So Chloe is about as perfect as they come in my books, based on what I like and dislike about a girl physically. After dinner she managed to convince me to go to this night club and dance with her and for some reason I decided to step up the amount of drinking I was doing until the next thing I new I was completely hammered and got tossed out of the night club. I barely remember everything, I just remember Julia being upset and I remember her looking at me feeling sorry for me almost disapprovingly. Somehow I woke up with my clothes on in my bed. I really have no idea how I got there. I have not heard back from Julia since then. I have sent her a message online and 2 emails. It does not look good - I think I blew it with her, but I'm ok with that because she wasn't really my type anyways.

Well the Cowboys lost in epic fashion so that really sucks. I used to live in Dallas so that is why I still have a thing for the Cowboys. I have got quite a few messages back from various girls and I have been chatting with some of them on msn and stuff.

One girl is named Chloe and she is a model. I am not sure what she wants with me cuz she is so smoking hot it is ridiculous. I am not sure why she is even on the dating site in the first place. I mean she is so hot she should not need to use an online dating site but she does. Maybe it is because many men in real life are not willing to approach her and talk to her because SHE IS so hot. There is no way in the world I would have ever walked up and just started talking to this girl in the real world - no way in hell. But online through a dating site it is so much easier to deal with rejection. No big deal at all, all you do is send them a message and see what happens and that is exactly what I did with this girl.

I wasn't even expecting to get a response back, but she did reply and said thanks for the compliments and then asked me a few questions about myself as if she was genuinely interested in me. She must approve of how I look because I never return messages to girls who I think are ugly etc that is just how it is in this world in my opinion. At least that is how I roll. So far we have only exchanged a few messages back and forth through the online dating site and I have not yet been able to make the transition over to instant messenger. Just the fact that such a hot chick is willing to talk to me has boosted my ego tenfold and now I feel like King Kong.

Another girl I have been chatting with is named Julia and she is only 25 years old, fresh out school and working for a textile company. I am not sure exactly what she does there, I think she works in administration. She is really cute and bubbly seems like a real life of the party type of attitude and personality. I have never been with a girl like this before. Usually I am attracted to more quiet reserved females but hey I am willing to try anything once. With this girl, we are already chatting on instant messenger and I can tell that she really likes me which is a good thing because she is very attractive and definitely my type. She said she just got out of a long term relationship of 2 years about a month ago but she doesn't care about that because she really likes me so far and we haven't even gone out on a date yet. I am going to be taking her out for dinner tomorrow night so I will let you know how that goes.

Women are so whack yo! I can't figure them out. That girl Dora that I went out with clubbing was mad because I never made a move on her. I was like but you were really drunk and she was so what. That kind of thing just pisses me off man girls don't make any sense at all, at least to me they don't. I ended up getting into a heated conversation with her and then eventually I was like whatever and deleted her from msn and blocked her. Whack ass bitches give me a headache. Why is it so hard for me to just meet a normal down to earth girl. I must be picking them wrong. I think I need to search for girls who look more wholesome and conservative. In fact once I am done with this blog entry that is exactly what I am going to do. I am going to search through the online dating site and pick some girls that look normal.

I am happy that Dallas Cowboys won last night. They totally dominated the Philadelphia Eagles last night it wasn't even close. There were so many fumbles and stuff it was crazy. Tonight is WEC and then tomorrow is UFC so I need to figure out where I am going to watch both those events. I have been so out of the loop when it comes to MMA that I am ashamed to admit it. I used to follow MMA so closely, now I don't even bother. I just let my friends who are new hardcore fans fill me in on what's happening and that works for me.

I have a sore throat and it is kind of troubling. I know I should go to the doctor but I am very stubborn and I am hoping it will just go away on it's own. I will post more once I heard back from the new girls I am about to message.

It's your boy Phil here! Holla Holla Yo! I had a great weekend and I wanted to share the highlights of it with y'all cuz I know some of you had crappy weekends being sick and stuff so here it goes. On Friday I met a girl online named Dora. She is a white girl and she is from eastern Europe. I am not sure if she said she is from Poland, or Hungary but I think it is one of those two places. She is 26 years old and she works at a car rental agency. Yeah I know it ain't no glamorous job but hey neither is being a line cook at a crappy restaurant which is the job that I got. She is like 5 foor 8 and really lean. I mean she ain't skinny or nothing and she got some junk in the trunk and shit but she ain't skinny like a model. I think she has a damn near perfect body for what I personally like. Like I said we met on Friday and we chatted all day first by email then by msn and eventually on the phone.

I had plans to go chill with my homies on Friday night but I ended up bailing on them just so I could chat it up with this female on the phone. It was cool and I had a good time getting to know her and getting to know her likes and dislikes. I told her I was a singer and she was asking me to sing for her over the phone but I was feeling to self conscience so I never ended up giving in and singing but I did promise her that I would eventually sing something for her at some point. She told me she just got out of a long term relationship that lasted for 3.5 years. She said that most of her past boyfriends were white guys but that was simply because that is the way that things worked out. She said she never had a lot of brothers hitting on her so what was she supposed to do. I was like that's cool baby but once you go black you never go back. Ok I didn't actually say that to her but I wanted to

She agreed to get together with me on Saturday for dinner. I told her that we should meet at this place called Kyma which is a Greek seafood tavern. Most people will say they have the best seafood in all of Atlanta and I couldn't agree more. We both took taxis there so that we could drink as much as we wanted to. I arrived 15 minutes early to our arranged meeting time and grabbed a nice booth so I could watch everything in the place with my back against a wall. That is what Shane used to do. Yes I just referenced a gay book called Shane about this traveling gunslinger or something. We had to read it in school is all I remember and he was all like - I only ever sit with my back against the wall so I can see everything.

She finally arrived 15 mins later than our arranged time and when she entered the restaurant she was chatting on her phone and I was like oh snap not one of these girls that is going to constantly play with her phone and be on it all the time sigh. She walked up to the table and at the same time told the person on the other end that she had to go. She apologized for being late and gave me a big hug. I was like ok thats cool I can work with this. She told me that she had just got off the phone with her mother. She said that her dad had got into a car accident and was over at Saint Joseph's Hospital being treated right now. I guess he had got t-boned going through an intersection and had got hit on the drivers side door and his leg was broken and had some metal shards stuck in it. I asked her if she wanted to go over to the hospital and visit him and she said no she appreciated the gesture but that he is a tough cookie and he will survive.

We put that topic to bed and started chatting more about how we couldn't believe we were finally getting to meet each other and how she thought I look more gangster in real life than online. I told her that I thought that she looked much more attractive in real life than online over webcam and pics etc. She was blushing and I was like why is she blushing because clearly she is a hot chick and must have lots of guys hitting on her all the time. Sometimes girls who are really hot rarely get hit on because most guys self defeat themselves beforehand and don't think that the girl is going to be attracted to them. They don't want to get shot down so they just don't even bother. I used to be like that when I was younger but now I just don't give a fuck and I will approach anyone anywhere.

We ordered food and the service was pretty good. We sipped on our drinks while we watched the place slowly fill up I mean it was a Saturday night and all. This party of 12 people ended up moving in like 10 feet away from us which was kind of annoying because they were really loud and I was trying to listen attentively to what she was saying. There were a few times where I didn't really hear the specifics of what she was saying so I just nodded or said I see I think. Hopefully she didn't catch on but I figured it would be more strategic to respond like that vs asking her to repeat it. Our food was really good and yes I think it was the best seafood I have ever had in Atlanta. I have had better seafood on the east and west coast but as far as Atlanta goes it was very good.

After dinner and coffee etc she said she wouldn't mind going and hitting up a club. Luckily I had a feeling she might say something like that and so I dressed appropriately to get into any place she had in mind. I told her ok let's go to Primal Night Club because I know most of the bouncers there. My best friend used to work there as a bouncer and I used to go there all the time so of course I know everyone. We got there at 10:30 and there was already a massive lineup. I just walked right up to the door and saw Jerry and Steve working the door. They were like what up dog, slapped some skin and let me in. I even heard some dude in line bitching about how we just skipped the line. The place was pumping inside and already shoulder to shoulder. I dragged her to the bar and we got a couple of drinks then she dragged me out into the center of the dance floor and we got our groove on. Around 1am she said she wasn't feeling very well and wanted to go home. I was like oooook I guess I ain't getting none tonight but that's ok because I don't like to mess with drunk girls anyways. We took the taxi to her place first and we exchanged a decent kiss and I told her I would call her. Today is Tuesday so I guess it is time to give her a dingle.

What up yo, my name is Phil and I am from Atlanta, Georgia. I know there is a lot of hot chicks out there roaming the streets and the clubs but I already done gone down that route and I ain't had me much luck ya heard? I am 29 and I work in a restaurant as a line cook. It ain't nothing fancy but it pays the bills. My real passion is music. I am trying to make it as a solo artist. I sing R & B and I can rap. I ain't really focusing on the rap scene much right now, I am focusing on getting better at singing ballads and stuff. I made this blog because I thought it would be a good outlet for me and another way of expressing myself and my creativity. I was married once when I was real young. We were high school sweethearts and we got married at 21... we were divorced by 24... since then I have had a few girlfriends off and on but none of them have been anything serious or anything that lasted longer than a few months. I guess that is why I decided to join an online dating site to meet girls in Atlanta instead of picking up girls at clubs. The way I see it, I gotta flip the script. The way I see it, the girls I have picked up so far haven't worked out so things can only get better not worse. There is no way to go but up from here. I joined the site this morning and shortly after I decided I would make a blog also and document my life as I embark on this new adventure. Hopefully I will have success and it will inspire you other cats to get online and meet girls too.